i-like-this

I happen to have a stellar body: 6-pack abs, obliques, and an upper body that looks like a separate chest piece, but I treat myself to Ben and Jerry’s, milk and cookies, pie, cake, and chips regularly. I have an all-American body: pouch, softness, and cheeks over my cheekbones; and I still wish I looked like Brad Pitt.

-I wonder what Brad Pitt would say.

There’s this guy I work with—a redneck, looks exactly like a lil’red, 24 but acts 10—and he likes leather, a lot. Leather is not manly; it’s gay and an abominable clothing choice. I know, I’m gay and I have a leather jacket.

Lil’red wears chaps and he doesn’t have a motorcycle.

In a gruff voice he whispered, as I was wearing my jacket, “you’re wearing leather, niiiccce.”

Bondage and shit was a thing. Now it is not.

The Public Libido of Simpelskurk

My SBF thought I was his girlfriend.

My SBF cuddled me in my sleep.

My SBF buys me things but he’s a chronic liar. My SBF is thief. I need to raise the bar next time.

A straight man’s butt is the grossest thing. Gay men keep that ass in check: no crack, no shit stain on the toilet, nice jeans. Thank you homosexuality, you keep my eyes on the road.

So I’ve a straight boyfriend for a while. A straight boyfriend is a straight man for whom you have a crush, they know it and they don’t mind. My straight boyfriend gave me a teasing kiss and I have seen him naked. Basically, he’s taken it a little too far.

Last night he asked me what it’s like to give a blow job while we were watching Mean Girls. Too many questions about what it’s like, how it feels, is it fun. I’m not looking for anything scandalous, serious, or sexual: if I was I’d flirt with a gay man. And I won’t be teased about this. It’s over.

FML.

At least I don’t feel like I have to break it to him.

Online shopping, eventually I’m just buying the models.

I Fucking love this! Where did this come from?

annapoppins:

YES YES YES

(Source: , via zombea)

fyeahqueervintage:

[image description: picture of two presumably male individuals in service uniform. One has their arm around the other. They are leaning forward as if about to kiss.]

knowhomo:

Vintage LGBTQ*

My heart is ever at your service. — William Shakespeare

Image: Photographer, subjects, unknown, c. 1940s (via woolfandwilde.com)

people who spend more than five minutes ‘discreetly’ swallowing their congestion of phlegm

Walking through the near south neighborhood before nine am, I realize that hot guys wear nothing but overalls, a-shirts or pajama bottoms as they walk their dogs through the alleys—Lincoln, I think I love you: muscles, tans, ethnicity, heights, and hair with a touch of husker or cowboy hat; I will be waking up early now.

Jim Burden to Antonia Shimerda

IV, The Pioneer Woman’s Story

My Antonia, Willa Cather